When you hear the word SPIRITUAL, do you think religion, church, pews, hymnals, do’s and don’ts? If so, then I want to see if I can bend your mind just a little bit this morning.
Tangibles vs. Intangibles
For men, it is easier to deal with the stuff we can see. Motors and wrenches and tasks and projects and stuff. We like to be able to work with stuff we can touch. And really, this is not a bad thing.
But, unbeknown to most men, there is a second layer to life—a spiritual layer of stuff that you can’t touch. Things like purpose, and meaning, and love, and experience, and significance, and feelings. (Yes, I just said the ‘F’ word.)
The Family Road Trip
I’m sure we’ve all experienced or seen this at one point—the family road trip where the Dad is intently focused on getting to the next Motel 6 in record time, with the least amount of stops, making everyone wait to go to the bathroom and not even considering stopping to take pictures at the scenic rest spots. After all, if you get there as quickly and efficiently as possible then you WIN something, right?
This is a man focused only on the tangibles—clocks and miles and bladder sizes.
When a man becomes aware of the intangibles—the spiritual side of life—he recognizes that the stuff you can’t see matters just as much, if not more. The squishy stuff like how people feel, the amount of fun they are having, the level of connection between you and your wife, the memories that are being created—these are the reasons to make the trip in the first place. If you want to get from point A to point B as fast as you can, sign up for a race and leave the kids at home.
Adding Depth To Your Life
I want to be clear at this point—I’m not talking about taking away your masculinity. I believe there is great value in being able to handle things in life as they come up. Instead, I want to ADD to your life. I want you to be able to have a deeper experience than just, “Cool, the oil’s changed.” I want you to be able to connect deeply to your spouse, to your children, to your friends. I want every experience you have, the good and the bad, to be seen as valuable and something that shapes your life. All of that happens when you’re able to see the intangibles through the tangibles.
How does a man become deeper? How do you develop your spiritual side? That is not as easy to answer. It requires a major perspective shift. It is easier to accomplish when sitting with someone who already recognizes the intangibles. It is better caught than taught.
I’m still looking for a decent resource to recommend to people. If anyone knows of something that has helped them, please leave a comment below.